This usenet post was posted on alt.os.linux.mandrake by someone some time ago.
Sorry for not crossposting to 7 other newsgroups as I could not figure out how to do that.
I decided to try Mandrake Linux as I heard it was a l337 system.
The first thing I noticed was that linux installed in a half hour, with a bunch of applications already installed. That seemed very reckless to me. Windows is much more careful and takes it's time, even going to the extent of multiple reboots to make sure everything is ok. Windows also doesn't install a lot of extra software. It makes sure that I know about every extra piece of software by making me install it separately.
Of course, I had to install a pirated version of Office as I can't afford to pay hundreds of dollars for it, and I got a virus, but that's just Windows way of making sure I install a pirated virus scanner, which is very important.
I know there is a free office suite called Open Office, but it must be just infested with spyware, as I know nobody gives away applications for nothing.
Windows also no longer supports my HP Scanjet 5300C scanner. I'm not sure why, but I know that it's a very good reason. Probably viruses. I can get it to work sometimes, probably when Windows thinks it's safe. Windows is very wise.
Linux detected my scanner and it always works, I'm sure giving my computer worms. It scares me.
Also, I recieve emails with extensions sometimes. I am always able to open them in Windows and run them. Some of them will email all my friends for me. Linux lets me open them, but never emails my friends for me. I don't think Linux likes my friends.
Windows also blocks me from seeing what's on my linux files, saving me from dangerous viruses. Viruses are everywhere. Linux will let me look at anything on my computer willy-nilly, even windows files. Very Dangerous.
I could go on and on, like about being able to read configuration files on Linux that Windows is wise enough to block anyone from seeing, to the automated repeated reboots Windows starts for me, that Linux seems to never want do.
I'm going back to Windows, as Linux isn't ready for the prime-time desktop.